Personal Power and the Blame Game

Sadly, a great many of us haven't actually lost our power - we've given it away. We do this to a great extent by playing the blame game.

Consider the middle manager who's been charged with implementing a change in process. He approaches his employees, beginning with, "OK, this is what they want us to do..."

Think about the message this sends to the employees. By not championing or taking ownership of situations, he has just positioned himself as a powerless pawn in the organization.

If that is indeed the case, why should employees be inclined to respect him or respond to him?

As long as we have someone else to blame, why should we feel responsible for fixing things?

Consider the coworker who regularly complains about the stupid things "they" do. Again, the message is that he is completely at the mercy of a bunch of stupid people. Hmm. What does it say about the person who chose to work for them?

Blame is a wonderful thing. It makes us feel better when we can convince ourselves that we're smarter than the people around us. (after all, if we were in charge, we wouldn't be making all of these obvious mistakes, would we?) And let's face it; as long as we have someone else to blame for our woes, we don't have to feel responsible for fixing things, do we?

Casting blame, however, while perhaps giving us some short-term satisfaction, damages our opportunities and happiness in the long term. It disempowers us and tells everyone around us that we are not willing to take control of those things within our control.

Instead of looking for what's wrong or who's to blame, look for what's right and how to make things better.

Here's a great rule to live by: Champion it, fix it or leave it. Blame is a game for the uninspired.

Have fun!

Shaun Belding president of Belding Skills Development, has played a significant role in the success of many world class companies. Shaun is author of the best-selling Winning With the...from Hell series of books, and is recognized as one of the world's leading experts in developing strategies and techniques for dealing with difficult people. His weekly Winning at Work email newsletter is filled with tips and techniques for dealing with the difficult people who drive you crazy. It also has great strategies for Winning in the Workplace, Winning with People and achieving Personal Success. Subscribe here.

Some Related Articles:

Transactional Analysis: An Introduction
What Game Are You Playing at Work Today?
Five Truths About Blame and How It Impacts Our Performance
The System Made Me Do It!
Untwist Your Thinking
The Power of One: How Small Actions Can Change Big Systems
'How Can You Be That Miserable So Early in the Morning?'

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