Telephone Etiquette
The Right Way to Make Calls

Most of the time, in our interactions with other people, we're so careful to make a good impression, so why so often do we let every thing go when making phone calls?

A typical teenager, I used to call my best friend every single day after school even though we had already spent the entire day together. Every time I called, even when I knew it was her voice answering the phone, I would always say, "Hello. May I please speak with Sonia?" "HEATHER!" she'd reply, "You KNOW it's me!"

I couldn't help it. It was habit. My mom had engrained proper telephone etiquette in me from the minute I was tall enough to reach the receiver.

This past month I've received several calls that have made me stop in my tracks. I've wondered if the people calling me have had any idea what kind of message they were sending over the phone. We work so hard to make a perfect first impression when we meet people face to face. Why do we forget all of our lessons over the phone?

The stories and examples in this article are real, and if you have a habit of doing or saying any of the same things, I beg you to change your ways immediately! (Names have been changed to protect the impolite.)

1. Asking to speak to a specific person

Incorrect:
"Ahhh... ahhh... Hello? Ahh... Heater, ah?" (or Header, Hader, Hetter or some variation)

It doesn't take long to pass judgement on the person whose first words on the phone are a bunch of sounds. Figure out what you're going to say before you call. Practice it if you need to. Your first sentence is the most important and sets the tone for the entire conversation.

If I am ever unsure of the name of the person I'm calling, then I use the last name (assuming it's easier). It's also more polite to use the last name if you've never called the person before and don't have a relationship with him/her.

Correct:
"Good morning. May I speak with Ms. Hansen, please?"

2. Identifying yourself

Incorrect:
"This is John! John! You know, John!"

Obviously, I don't know! It's important to give people a little bit more information over the phone. Remember that when you call someone you are most likely interrupting them while they are in the middle of working on something totally unrelated to you. Don't assume they'll know who you are right away, even if you have spoken with them before. You need to be very specific as to who you are.

Correct:
"This is John Smith. I attended your workshop at the Holiday Inn last April."

At this point I may or may not know exactly who you are, but at least I have a frame of reference.

If you've never met the person you're calling it's important first to explain how you know of the person and then why exactly you're calling:

Correct:
"This is John Smith. I received your number from my sister/friend/colleague Jane Brown who used to work with you at Acme Co. I'm calling because I am interested in hearing more about the financial planning services you're now offering."

3. When you call the wrong number

Incorrect:

Caller: Angela there, or not?
Me: No, I'm sorry; I think you have the wrong number.
Caller: Oh! CLICK

Wait a second here! I have the courtesy and consideration to empathize with someone (a total stranger, mind you) who interrupted my day in a very rude fashion, and then the person goes and hangs up on me? You've got to be kidding! A more considerate phone call would go something like this:

Correct:
Caller: May I speak with Angela, please?
Me: I'm sorry; I think you have the wrong number. Caller: Oh! I'm sorry to disturb you!
Me: That's alright.
Caller: Do you mind if I check the number with you? (This is a good idea so you don't call me back again because you have the wrong number to begin with)
Me: Not at all.
Caller:I was trying to reach 6233 2822.
Me: It sounds like you dialed incorrectly. This is 6232 2822. (It is not necessary to give out your number if you don't feel comfortable.)
Caller: Oh, ok. Thanks so much for your help, and sorry to bother you.
Me: Not a problem. Bye.
Caller: Bye.
CLICK

It might take a few more seconds out of your day, but I would much rather have a considerate conversation with someone and end the call on a positive note than be irritated over another inconsiderate caller disturbing my day.

4. Ending a call due to an interruption

Incorrect:
Me: (I can hear another phone ringing in the background)
Caller: (suddenly very rushed when we’re in the middle of our conversation) Ok, great. Thanks. That’s fine. Talk to you later. Bye. CLICK

Me: Uhhhh....

We're all busy these days, and you'll seldom meet someone who doesn't have a home phone, office phone, mobile phone, blackberry, etc. and who doesn't have at least two of them ringing off the hook at the same time. It's understandable that you might be interrupted with another call. Just remember, when you choose to end one call to start another you are making your priorities very clear to the person you're speaking with.

You need to make the appropriate choice for the situation. If you're calling someone you don't know well and who is important to your business, you probably shouldn't hang up on them in the middle of the conversation. However, if you're just chit chatting with a close friend and an important call comes in, of course they'll understand if you suddenly have to go.

Correct:

(Phone ringing in the background)
Caller: “Uh-oh... I have another call coming in. Do you mind if I call you back in a few minutes? Thanks.”

OR:

Caller: “I’m sorry. You can probably hear my other phone ringing. They can leave a message. Please, continue what you were saying.”

There are many other situations we could cover when making calls to people, but hopefully these have given you something to think about. The rule of thumb is to always be polite and considerate, just as you would be if you were standing face-to-face with the person.

The impression you make on the phone is incredibly important and could determine your success or failure in building professional and personal relationships.

Heather Hansen, founder of Singapore-based Hansen Speech and Language Training, is a professional speech and language coach, public speaker and voice-over artist. For more information, visit http://www.hansenslt.com or call (65) 6232 2822.

Some Related Articles:

How to Maintain Energy on the Phone
Phone Rage: Victim or Unwilling Perpetrator?
Are You a Cell Phone Sinner?
Don't Call Us. We'll Call You: How to Lose a Job Over the Phone
Five Tips for Keeping Your Business Calls Cordial and Professional

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