Do you love to a plan family gatherings, but often find yourself exhausted before the big day?

Certainly, as the planner, you want everyone to enjoy the family event. But, you should being enjoying the day too. The following ideas on organizing a family reunion will leave you with energy to have fun yourself and look forward to planning your next family gathering.

Plan ahead!

"Spur of the moment” planning rarely makes for fun and rewarding family gatherings.

If family members feel they are choosing between something they really need to do, and going to a “last minute” family social event, chances are they are not going to have a good time even if they do show up at the gathering. By letting family members know well in advance of a family event, you continue to show love and respect for them.

Recently, we attended a Baby Shower for our daughter, Natosha. Even though everyone invited lives within an hour’s drive, this particular event was planned over two months ago. Don’t assume because people live nearby that there won’t be schedules to arrange in order to make the reunion. Plan early!

Follow up shortly before the event

Follow up and don't rely solely on RSVP! Take time to make a phone call, email, or write to check in with family members to see if their schedule is still allowing them to attend a family event.

In June of this year, we got together with our oldest son, his wife, our grandson, and our youngest son. We started talking about the reunion last February and checked in with each other about every month to make sure everyone’s schedule was still open. This really helped because we had to change the date twice along the way.

Whether you are planning a reunion for months from now, or just days, following up on schedules makes for a more successful event.

Pick a gathering place that's comfortable for everyone

During the years I was growing up, my family had most of it’s gatherings at my grandparents' home - a place that was very relaxing. They lived in a small town of about 200 people, near farmland and a river where many of my cousins and me played as children.

For long as I can remember, fifty or so of my relatives would gather in my grandparents' front yard every summer in lawn chairs and around picnic tables, feasting on delights like watermelon, hamburgers, hot dogs, and potato salad. I remember how wonderful it was to look around and see everyone having a good time.

Even if it requires some travel, if the meeting place holds a special feeling for everyone, then family members will make their best effort to come. My grandparents' place was just such a place. Some of my relatives travelled an exceptionally long distance not to miss the summer gathering.

Relax before the gathering

Family reunions are special, especially if planning one has taken a lot of time, effort, and money. If you are in charge of the reunion, you owe to yourself and other family members to arrive fresh and both physically and mentally ready to enjoy the proceedings.

You have been working on many details and gathering ideas for the event, while simulaneously carrying on with your own daily routine. Take a few minutes, or preferably a few hours, before the event and relax your body and mind.

After all, you are the host. So, get help setting up the party to allow yourself to be rested to greet and mingle with family when they arrive.

Choose the food with care

Every family has those time-honored "favorite" meals they like to share at a family reunion. Even so , it pays to prepare your reunion meals with personal tastes, even allergies, in mind.

If your family is like ours, then barbeque is common at your reunions. Yet, some family members have sensitive stomachs that can't tolerate too much spice, or have an allergy to some spices in barbeque dishes. You might already know about special diets in your family, but diets and tolerance to certain foods can change over time.

Let everyone invited know well in advance what will be on the menu. Better yet, let family members bring some of their favorite foods as well as get suggestions from them on what they would like to eat. As with other aspects of organization, enlisting the help of other family members will make your work much easier.

Include interesting activities for all ages

When planning a get-together, consider the ages and interests of family members. Finding some common interests will help ensure everyone's participation. Card games and Croquet are still favorites in our family for members of all ages.

Manage the event, not the people!

This may be the most important reminder of all to guarantee a good time for all at a family gathering.

Even for the smallest of gatherings, people are people. Often, family members will select their “favorites” among everyone. A good rule is to invite everyone to participate in games or talking, but let them choose what they want to do or who they want to mingle with during the event.

Enjoy!

Enjoy- This should be a “no-brainer.” But, not all family reunions turn out well. I have walked into family gatherings and immediately felt a blast of tension.

This goes back to my previous tip about coming relaxed to a gathering. Hosting a family gathering often puts you center-stage with others following your lead. If this is so, chances are everyone else is going to feel your energy level as well.

You can set the tone for the party with either a negative or positive vibe. The planning is done. So, enjoy...enjoy...and enjoy some more!

Look for when everyone is getting restless or tired

It is easy to get caught up in the excitement of a family reunion when everyone is getting along and having fun. Still, everyone has their limits.

If you are one in charge of the reunion, look for signs when it may be time to close the event. People yawning and looking sleepy (except for people like my dad who always headed for the lounge chair after one of my grandmother's meals!), or kids getting a little cranky, are good signs that it's time to call it a day.

Take time for Goodbyes

Like starting a family reunion with a warm “hello,” it is important end one with a warm farewell. Take time to give hugs and kisses. Especially if family members have traveled a long distance, it may be some time before you see them again. Rounding out a family reunion with the same positive feeling you came with will make you want to meet again.

Don't leave without a commitment to meet again

If you want to set a plan in motion for your next family reunion, talking about it before leaving your present gathering is helpful.

You may want to talk about gathering at a new place, setting a new date that works better for everyone, or a better time of the day. Many things ca n change between family gatherings. But talking over things for the next meeting, even writing down some tentative ideas, will set a good plan in motion.

In the case of our recent reunion with our two sons and family, we planned another family “day” for late fall before leaving. It will be another special day for us. We are going back to pick up some baby “things” they want to give us for our family's newest arrival in November... a baby girl named, Makayla, to our daughter, Natosha.

Years go past and times continue to change. But, some of my favorite memories are of family reunions, sharing good food and fun. I hope that you and your family will find these tips helpful in making your next reunion a memorable one.

Copyright, 2006, David Duncan

David Duncan lives in in Saint Paul, Minnesota. He has spent the last twenty-five years in the Food/Hospitality industry in various leadership roles. In 1994, he graduated from Metropolitan State University (Saint Paul) with a degree in Non-Profit Administration. David also runs an independent home business together with his wife, Margaret. You can contact David at david.duncan2006@hotmail.com. Visit David and Margaret on the Web at: http://www.ryze.com/go/dmtduncan.

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